Music Mental Health Diary Entry Day 11: Letting Go of Regret

By Rich Steve Beck

You’re knackered, hunched over your desk, stuck on that one moment you wish you could redo. Life chucks stuff at you. Work grinds you down. Choices you didn’t make—or made wrong—stick like mud. Regret’s a heavy bugger. You sink hours into something, then bin it. You miss a chance and feel it in your gut. It drags you back. Musicians, producers—I’ve been there, gutted over a track I let slip through my fingers. You’ve got things to do, dreams to chase. Shake it off. Step up.

Name the Thing That’s Eating You

You can’t ditch what you won’t look at. Grab a pen and pin it down. Make it real. “I dodged that call last week.” “I lost something I needed.” “I kept quiet when I should’ve spoken.” I had a mate who couldn’t stop nattering about a job he left half-done. One day, he scribbled it out: “Dropped the Ball, June.” Seeing it stark on paper cut its claws. You do it. Write what’s gnawing at you. Stare it down.

What’s chewing your insides? Scratch it out now.

Stop Playing It Over

Your head’s a broken record, stuck on that slip-up. You hear the stumble in your voice. You see the ball you dropped. Cut it off. Get up and shake out your arms. Stick on a tune that lifts you. Splash cold water on your face—I mean it, feel the shock. I once couldn’t shake a mix I’d butchered. It looped in my skull. I blasted something loud and broke the spell. You don’t need to live it again. Find your switch. Flip it next time.

What yanks you out of that rut? Give it a go.

Learn Something and Walk Away

Regret’s got a point if you listen. Figure out what it’s telling you, then leave it behind. Ask what cocked up and why. Job went pear-shaped? You didn’t give it time. Shot passed you by? You froze. Result stung? You read it wrong. A pal of mine fluffed a pitch once—proper mess. He swore at himself for ages. Then he practised and smashed the next one. You snag the lesson. You ditch the baggage.

What’s your last regret teaching you? Scribble it.

Stick to Today

You can’t fix yesterday’s muck-up. You can crack on with today. Look at what’s right here. Sort that small task this morning. Plan your next move by lunch. Kick off something new tonight. I’ve told producers—you—stuck on a lost track to start fresh today. I’ve done it myself and landed a win. You’ve got this minute. Use it.

What can you tackle now? Get on it.

Ditch the “What If” Nonsense

You torture yourself with maybes. “What if I’d said yes?” “What if I’d tried harder?” It’s a bloody waste. You don’t know. Say it out loud, “That’s gone.” Write what you’ll do next. Tell a mate to slap you if you start. I knew a lad who wouldn’t shut up about a missed gig. “Could’ve been it,” he’d moan. I said, “What’s your next job?” He did it and forgot the rest. You’re not a time machine. Stay here.

What’s your “what if”? Chuck it.

Keep Tabs on Your Wins

Regret blinds you to what you pull off. You stew on the flops. Turn it round. Jot down what you nail. “Sorted a job in an hour.” “Got a thumbs-up from someone.” “Fixed a mess today.” A mate of mine used to shrug off her own work. She’d whinge about a lost chance. She started listing her daily hits and perked up. You do decent stuff. Spot it. Claim it.

What did you smash today? Write it down.

Set Yourself Little Wins

Regret festers when you float. Give yourself a nudge. Pick targets you can hit. Finish one thing this morning. Sketch a plan by midday. Wrap something by tomorrow. I’ve told musicians—you—stuck on a dead tune to lay down one idea today. I’ve done it and built from there. You don’t need massive leaps. Start small. Keep going.

What’s one thing you can do today? Pick it.

Let Rough Days Slide

Some days, you’re off. You cock up a job. Every choice feels rubbish. It’s fine. Forcing it makes it worse. Give yourself an hour off. Stick on a daft telly show. Hit reset tomorrow. I’ve scrapped a day’s work after faffing for hours. Kept at it, got nowhere. I grabbed a brew, chilled, and came back solid. You’re human. Take a breather.

When did you last cut yourself slack? Do it next time.

Keep Your Stuff Safe

Regret loves when you lose things. A file vanishes. A plan falls apart. Stop it happening. Save your work every chance. Back it up daily. Label it clear: “Work_Day3_Done.” A bloke I know lost a big piece once—no copies. He was gutted for weeks. Now he saves like a maniac and rests easy. You dodge that kick. Start now.

When did you last back up? Sort it.

Spill It to Someone

You don’t need to bottle it up. Let it out. Tell a mate, “I’m hacked off about that.” Say to a colleague, “I wish I’d done this different.” I once moaned to a pal about a job I’d fluffed. “Mate, I ballsed it,” I said. He laughed, told me his own cock-up. It lightened the load. You’ve got folks. Use them.

Who can you natter to today? Give them a shout.

Switch Up Your Game

Regret keeps you stuck in old ruts. You redo what flopped. Mix it up. Try a fresh way. Shift your space. Tackle a job different. A lass I worked with regretted samey results. She always did it one way. She flipped her approach and sparked up. You don’t need to rerun the past. Try something new.

What’s one tweak you’ll make? Test it.

Take a Proper Break

Regret can mean you’re knackered. You grind too long. You hate your calls. Spot it. Stop. Skip a day’s work. Walk round the block. Crash out for eight hours tonight. I’ve watched producers—you—push till every note’s wrong. I’ve taken a day off and bounced back. You need a rest. Grab it.

When did you last switch off? Plan it.

Grab Help If It Won’t Shift

Regret hangs on sometimes. You try this stuff. It sticks. Reach out. Pros can sort it. Ring your GP for a natter. Check Mind’s site for help. Ask a mate who’s been there. A lad I know drowned in regret over a past call. Therapy yanked him out. Months on, he’s cracking on. You don’t need to lug it alone. Help’s out there.

What’s holding you back from asking? Face it.

Build Your Own Fix

You’re you. Your regrets are yours. Shape your way out. Try these bits. Keep what clicks. Noting wins might steady you. Goals might push you. A break might clear the fog. I’ve seen folks lean on tunes to reset, while I need a tight list. Find your groove. Tweak it as you go. You’re the boss.

What’s one thing you’ll try today? Kick it off.

Dump the Old Junk

You cling to past flops. That half-arsed job from last year. That idea you didn’t chase. Let it go. It feeds regret. Bin the files. Shove them out of sight. Start fresh today. A mate kept old stuff he’d never finish. Regretted it daily. He ditched it and moved on. You don’t need that weight. Lose it.

What’s one old bit you’ll bin? Sort it.

Lean on Others’ Views

Regret grows when you’re blind. You guess what flopped. Ask instead. Get a mate’s take. Call someone: “What worked? What didn’t?” Share a plan and hear them out. Use it next time. I regretted a job that tanked once. Asked a pal why. “Too quick,” he said. I paced it better after. You learn from other eyes. Tap them.

Who can you ask today? Ring them.

Scribble Your Day

Regret muddies what you’ve done. You forget your wins. Track it. Log your moves. “Fixed a hitch, 10 a.m.” “Sent a draft, noon.” “Nailed a job, 3 p.m.” A colleague regretted “empty days.” Started a log. Saw he’d smashed it. You do more than you reckon. Show yourself.

What’s one thing you did today? Stick it down.

Map Your Next Bit

Regret loves a aimless slog. You drift, then kick yourself. Set a path. Plan your day. Morning: finish a task. Afternoon: line up a move. Evening: check it and rest. I’ve told musicians—you—to map a session when regret creeps in. Keeps me straight too. You run your time. Lay it out.

What’s your next bit? Plan it.

Back Your Gut

Regret makes you doubt. You second-guess every step. Trust your instinct. It’s sounder than you think. Pick a way and go. Make a call and hold it. Finish when it feels right. I’ve regretted faffing over a mix. Started going with my first hunch—worked a treat. You know your game. Trust it.

What’s one call you’ll back today? Make it.

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Rich Steve Beck is a podcaster (PMFC Global TV), pro audio engineer/producer community leader (Produce Mix Fix and Conquer), full Music Producers Guild member, and pro mastering engineer who's worked with platinum-selling and Grammy-winning audio engineers.

He is also on a huge journey discovering about his own mental health and has felt a calling, as a large music community leader, to be an advocate for open mental health discussions across the industry.

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